Our Mrs. Reynolds

Standard
Bandit #1:  “And I think maybe you’re gonna give me a little one-on-one time with the missus.”
(Husband) Jayne: “Oh, I think you might wanna reconsider that last part. See, I married me a powerful ugly creature.”
(Wife) Mal:  “How can you say that? How can you shame me in front of new people?”
(Husband) Jayne:  “If I could make you purtier, I would.”
(Wife) Mal: “You are not the man I met a year ago.” (they suddenly draw their guns on the bandits, Mal slowly pulling his bonnet off)
Mal: “Now think real hard. You been bird-dogging this township a while now. They wouldn’t mind a corpse of you. Now you can luxuriate in a nice jail cell, but if your hand touches metal, I swear by my pretty floral bonnet: I will end you.”
Inara: “So, explain to me again why Zoe wasn’t in the dress?”
Mal: “Tactics, woman! Needed her in the back. ‘Sides, them soft cotton dresses feel kind of nice. There’s a whole airflow.”
Inara: “And you would know that because…?”
Mal: “You can’t open the book of my life and jump in the middle. Like woman, I’m a mystery.”
Inara: “Best keep it that way. I withdraw the question.”
 
Mal: “Zoe, would you get Wash?”
Zoe: “This is Zoe. We need all personnel in the cargo bay.”
Mal: “‘All?’ I said Wash.”
Zoe: “Captain, everyone should have a chance to congratulate you on your day of bliss.”
Mal: “There’s no bliss. I don’t know this girl!”
Jayne: “Then can I know her?”
Zoe: “Jayne, don’t sully this!”
Mal: “You are going to be cleaning out latrines with your face if you don’t cut that out.”
 
Book: “If you take sexual advantage of her, you’re going to burn in a very special level of hell. A level they reserve for child molesters and people who talk at the theater.”
 
Mal: “I would appreciate it if one person on this boat would not assume I’m an evil, lecherous hump.”
Zoe: “No one’s saying that, sir.”
Wash: “Yeah, we’re pretty much just giving each other significant glances and laughing incessantly.”
 
Mal: “Are you offering me a trade?”
Jayne: “A trade!? Hell, it’s theft! This is the best damn gun made by man. It has extreme sentimental value. It’s miles more worthy than what you got.”
Mal: “What I got? She has a name.”
Jayne: “So does this!” (caresses the gun lovingly) “I call it Vera.”
Mal: “Well, my days of taking you seriously are certainly coming to a middle.”
 
Jayne: “See, Vera? Dress yourself up you get taken out somewhere fun.”
 
Saffron:  “You gonna kill me?”
Mal: “Can you conjure up a terribly compelling reason for me not to?”
Saffron:  “I didn’t kill you.”
Mal: “You handed me and my crew over to those that would kill us. That buys you nothing.”
Saffron:  (smiles) “I made you dinner.”
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About TJ

In 2015 my family moved from a small village in mid-Michigan to five beautifully forested acres in Northern Michigan. We love the lakes and rivers, the forests, and the billions of stars we can see in the night sky, as well as the many cultural and historical activities in our area. We also love that the deer and wild turkeys come right up to our house. This is where our hearts are! I have multiple cats (five the last time I counted), and a sweet introverted dog who rarely barks and who deeply loves the six adorable ducks and nine chickens that have become part of our family. I enjoy reading, studying, writing, and learning new things. I also enjoy walking my dog, cuddling my cats, and gardening. I love nature. The world fascinates me.

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